Breaking
by kira1725
Summary: Karkat has seen the changes in Gamzee. He knows his relationship is ending. It doesn't stop him from seeking out Gamzee, though.


_Prompt 1 of 25: Breaking_

_Breaking: v, __separate or cause to separate into pieces as a result of a blow, shock, or strain._

Breaking

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and you feel very much ALONE.

It has been a few perigees since you've first started to meet your ancestors and it is almost the end of your second 'year' on the meteor. You and your ragtag team of absolute fucked-up shits have made it right over the halfway mark on this miserable piece of rock.

Congratu-Fucking-lations!

Well, if things were going better you would be happier and maybe not so much alone. You don't talk to your meteor mates. You're too annoyed by them right now. Kanaya was the one to seek _you_ out after all the times you tried to seek _her_ out during your first year only to find Rose right there next to her like a parasite on its host.

She confided in you that Roses' drinking was getting out of control, which you had to agree with. That's when Kanaya sputtered and rambled and nothing came out of that discussion to get her off of the stuff, despite your many suggestions. Kanaya wouldn't hear of it, too nervous about Rose breaking up with her to do anything. Whatever, she is Rose's Matesprit. You can't do anything without her permission.

Dave has been acting like a lost puppy after he broke up with Terezi for dating Gamzee, which he NOT FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT.

It's still a sore spot for you to say the least.

Your unhappiness has mostly been caused by your moirail. During the beginning of your moirallegiance everything was fine. Doing your best, you sought him out often and you helped him to remain calm and talked him through the religious aspect of his murderous rage which pacified him a great deal. He seemed generally happy after that as well.

The spoor thing was harder, by far harder, and it pained him, which you hated. You tried to be there for him, but he hurt you which you endured a couple times and when you finally screamed and went into a haze after feeling your mind being ripped apart due to a lashing out of a chucklevoodoo is when Gamzee looked truly mortified about his own powers. You still stayed though, even after that.

Then, the second year came around, your ancestors bugged you and Gamzee changed for the worst. He hid from you more and more, which you ended up figuring out why, mostly. That didn't anger you that much, not after you overheard him tell Rose that the only reason you weren't told was because he didn't want to hurt you. It still hurt, but you guess it is what your moirail thought was the best for you, even if he knew that engaging in that particular relationship would hurt you and he still did that.

No, what angered you was the narcissistic filth that was vomited on you whenever he spoke. All about how he hoped to be great and awesome and achieve his destiny which has been revealed to him. It sounded like his earlier bullshit and he looked at you with such malice that you dropped that notion. It was as if your last year of work meant nothing and he was right back where he was but even more sober.

It was horrible and it makes you feel like a horrible moirail. Then, he moved and didn't tell you. He did that sometimes, to keep Kanaya on her toes. This time though, you couldn't find him. You've looked over the whole meteor to the best of your knowledge, which is more than everyone minus Gamzee combined knows, and you can't find him.

You give up for the day; chalk it up to him being busy. You don't think that after the ninth day. He's avoiding you. You would like to think it doesn't bother you, that you only where in this relationship to pacify his anger and to stop all of the murder, you bloodpusher says that is there is so much more to it than that.

So, when he shows up in a dark hall with Vriska's head on the tenth day, you're not sure why your heart beats so much slower than louder. He isn't happy as you approach him. His eyes are different slightly reminding you of someone you know buy you just can't put your finger on who.

"Why are you motherfucking here?" Gamzee's voice raises gradually over the sentence as it will descend over the next, then back up and down like a roller coaster. The fluxes of his voice used to be more abrupt, but he abandoned that like his old typing quirk about almost a year back. Just another change you don't understand. The question makes you think twice about going any further towards him.

"You know why. Someone has to look after you on this meteor and it sure isn't going to be Kanaya." He cocks his head, innocence on the face of a killer, and looks you straight in the eye in a fit of studding clarity.

"Why?" I can look after myself." You feel your chest growing heavy. You feel vulnerable. "I don't need a motherfucker who does that motherfucking thing." Your chest falls to the floor. Your insides feel empty. No, no, he doesn't mean what he is saying.

"Ga-"

"Motherfucker." Gamzee says all of a sudden like he wasn't done talking though he clearly was. _Strange_.

A silence follows, you can't feel your heart but there is still one small speck of hope that lives inside you, a foolish last little light.

"Gamzee, do you understand what you are fucking saying.?" You ask, just in case he doesn't. He doesn't know all the romance scenarios like you, he doesn't know that this is the scene in every rom-com where the break up destroys at least one of the involves heart and bashes said heart into the ground. That character is you. You are that character.

"Go away, motherfucker." He walks away and you walk in the other direction and it is almost a run by the time you turn the next corner. You can't stop him, you can't plea.

You feel alone and ignored and fucking _heart_ _broken_. God _shit_, so _this_ is what having a broken diamond is like. You feel like you want to die or at least curl up and cry for a good sweep. So that is what you do. You curl up in your room, avoid everyone, and fall into a depression for almost a whole year. All the while trying to ignore the pain in your chest but you still listen as your heart continues to break into smaller and smaller pieces.

_Compliments? Concerns? Complaints?_

_Put them in a Review!_

_I'm doing 25 prompts and this is the first! This will have a sequel, but it will be full of spoilers for the new act, so I am going to make it its own story just in case. Some of the things in here may not make sense until then, but hey… I do what I can._

_Thank you for Reading!_


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